Далида Жаддат. IN THE COLD NORTH WE CROSSED PATHS

I’m pretty sure I will love you till my last breath,
But it wasn’t love that filled my heart all these years.
Every month, day, minute, my entire mind was consumed by you.
I imagined your loving, caring, passionate brown eyes,
The warmth of your words, the steady comfort in our conversations.
It took me time to realize how much I was submerged,
Lost in a dream of you that I could never quite wake from.

I’m sitting next to your high school right now,
Writing these words like a farewell letter,
As if I’m speaking to you for the last time.
The memory of our warm embraces lingers,
How you made me laugh like no one else ever could.
I wonder what kind of memories you’ll keep of me
Perhaps, just an emotional, naive, lost redheaded girl.

I remember how I finally saw you a month ago,
After we first crossed paths two winters ago, in the cold north.
Eye to eye, the ache of loss, confusion, and agony evaporated,
As if all the distance between us vanished in that moment.
You haven’t changed, but I know I have.
Maybe we’ve outgrown each other, our lives moving in different directions.
Go to Italy, chase your dreams, and find a new girl,
Someone for whom you’ll be ready to do what you couldn’t for me.

This is the last poem I’ll write for you.